Understanding Online Danger: What Parents Need to Know (And What Your Teen Might Not Be Telling You)

Let’s be honest – the online world can feel like a different universe. If you're a parent, it might seem impossible to keep up with what your teenager is seeing, saying, or being exposed to online.

With Netflix’s latest hit show Adolescence getting everyone talking, now feels like the right time to open up an important conversation – one that’s not just about screen time or social media, but about the hidden meanings and risks behind what kids are actually engaging with.

At Avon Valley Security, we usually focus on protecting people in the physical world – venues, events, businesses – but online safety is just as important, especially when it comes to our young people.

The Hidden Language of Emojis

One thing we’ve noticed recently is how everyday symbols – things like emojis – are being used to share very different messages in certain corners of the internet. What might look harmless to us could mean something totally different in online subcultures, especially those linked to toxic ideologies or harmful behaviour.

Here are just a few examples of emojis and codes being used in worrying ways:

🔴 Red Pill – “I see the truth.” Often used in misogynistic online groups to suggest they've ‘woken up’ to hidden truths about women and society.

🔵 Blue Pill – “Still asleep.” Used to mock people who believe in equality or mainstream values.

💥 Dynamite – Represents someone who’s gone from red pill to more extreme or radical views.

🫘 Kidney Bean – Linked to incel (involuntarily celibate) communities, often in a mocking or hateful context.

💯 100 Emoji – Tied to the belief that only 20% of men are attractive to 80% of women – a common theme in toxic male spaces.

🕳️ Black Hole – Used to show feelings of hopelessness or depression, often linked to online echo chambers.

🌪️ Tornado – Can symbolise mental overwhelm or emotional chaos.

🐸 Frog Emoji – Sometimes associated with extremist meme culture.

🦅 Eagle – A symbol that’s occasionally used in far-right or ultra-nationalist online groups.

💀 Skull – While it can mean “that’s hilarious,” it’s also used to hint at nihilism or darker thoughts.

Even the coloured hearts can carry different meanings:

❤️ Love

💜 Lust

💛 “Are you interested?”

💗 Flirting but not sexual

🧡 Reassurance – “You’ll be okay”

So… what can parents do?

First, don’t panic. Most teens using these symbols aren’t involved in anything dangerous – but awareness is key. The goal isn’t to snoop or shame; it’s to build trust, open up conversation, and help young people navigate their online world with confidence.

Here’s how you can start:

1️⃣ Get Curious, Not Combative

Instead of jumping in with “What does this mean?!” try something more relaxed:

“I read something about emojis having secret meanings online – ever heard of that?”

Keep it casual. You’re more likely to get a real answer.

2️⃣ Create a Judgment-Free Zone

If your teen thinks they’re going to get told off, they’ll shut down. Make it clear you’re there to listen, not just lecture.

3️⃣ Decode Together

Ask them to explain their online world. What do different symbols mean? Who do they follow? What are the jokes, the trends, the influencers? You might be surprised by what you learn.

4️⃣ Teach Critical Thinking

Encourage them to question what they see:

“Why do you think someone would want others to believe that?”

“Who benefits from this kind of thinking?”

It’s about building their filters, not just their firewalls.

5️⃣ Monitor Without Spying

Make digital check-ins normal – not just something you do when something goes wrong. Openness beats secret surveillance every time.

6️⃣ Talk About Manipulation

Explain how some toxic online spaces groom young people – by making them feel special, included, or like they’re in on something other people don’t get. That feeling of belonging can be powerful, even when it’s harmful.

7️⃣ Build Real-World Confidence

The more your child feels secure, valued, and confident offline, the less they’ll need validation from dodgy corners of the internet.

Final thoughts from me…

The truth is, online culture evolves faster than most of us can keep up. But the good news is – we don’t have to be in the dark.

As parents, carers, and trusted adults, we have more influence than we think. And with the right conversations, we can help young people feel empowered and safe – both on and offline.

If you’re ever unsure or want more guidance around safety (digital or physical), feel free to reach out. At Avon Valley Security, we’re here to help our communities stay informed, protected, and supported – in every way that matters.